Tag: Marriage Data

One Tip for Intimacy (In Today’s Busy World)

Have your mornings lost their passion and connection? Do you find yourself rushing out of bed and out the door having barely spoken to your partner? Or are you so exhausted from your day that you fall asleep before hugging, kissing or connecting with your partner? We and many couples we talk to have lives that are so busy and hectic, that they barely stop, to look at each other and connect.

One day I went to our bookshelf and there was the “The Tao of Sexology” by Dr. Stephen T. Chang. I was reminded about the Morning and Evening Prayer. It’s a way to connect in busy times. Lewis and I like it for that very reason. We don’t do it every day and sometimes a week or two will go by but we are happy when we do take the time for this practice.

In a nutshell, a couple lays together naked for about 5 minutes with lips locked. The man does penetrate the woman and you breathe together. There is an energetic flow that feels good. This technique is simple, intimate and best of all can be tailored to your time frame.

Good Luck !

Why “Madly In Love Forever” Is Needed

There are more single people today than ever in history- 101 million in the U.S., 46% of the adult population (37.5 million/28% in 1970)
Over 25% of households are single occupant households (17% in 1970)
53% of households are married couples (70% in 1970)
The marriage rate is decreasing, and is at its lowest in 30 years
The divorce rate has remained stable since 1988
While the exact divorce rate is a matter of debate, experts agree that somewhere between 40 and 60% of all marriages will end in divorce, and that for every marriage there is about one divorce
Co-habitation is increasing, with a higher failure rate than marriage
Single, separated, divorced or widowed people have higher rates of mental health disorders, depression, and suicide
The percentage of young adults who say that having a good marriage is extremely important to them is increasing (94% in one study)
The majority of first-born children are now conceived by, or born to, unmarried parents
Half of all children will spend some time in a single parent family
43% of first marriages end within 15 years
39% of remarriages end within 10 years
More than 85% of all adults marry at least once

A summary of a 1999 study by David Popenoe and Barbara Dafoe Whitehead of the National Marriage Project of Rutgers University on “The State Of Our Unions: The Social Health Of Marriage in America” states:

“Key social indicators suggest a substantial weakening of the institution of marriage. Americans have become less likely to marry. When they do marry their marriages are less happy. And married couples face a high likelihood of divorce. Over the past four decades, marriage has declined as the first living together experience for couples and as a status of parenthood. Unmarried cohabitation and unwed births have grown enormously, and so has the percentage of children who grow up in fragile families.”

U.S. Census Bureau http://www.census.gov/
SmartMarriages www.smartmarriages.com
National Marriage Project http://marriage.rutgers.edu/state.html
American Association For Single People http://www.unmarriedamerica.com/

When Love Is Challenged By An “Unwelcome Intruder”

A staggering 19 million Americans are diagnosed with depression every year.  When one person in the relationship is depressed, the odds of  divorce occuring are 10 times higher.

We are excited to share what we believe to be a valuable tip.  At the Smart Marriage Conference in July 2010, we attended a session called  “Marriage and Depression: Coping With Depression As A Couple.”  The session leaders, Dennis Lowe, Ph.D and Emily Scott-Lowe, Ph.D told us that they called the depression in their marriage the unwelcome intruder.  Why?  By viewing the depression as an unwelcome intruder, a couple has an easier time uniting  to meet this external challenge.  They are not angry at each other, they are angry at the unwelcome intruder in the relationship.

Let’s say the couple dealing with depression can’t go out and socialize anymore. One may angrily say, “Everything is so different; because of you, we don’t see friends anymore!”  If instead, you view the depression as an unwelcomed intruder, you may hear, “I am so angry at what depression is doing to our social life.”

The Lowes asked us to share this tip-it works-and can make a shift in a couple instantly. So please pass it along to anyone coping with depression in his or her marriage or relationship.

The Maturity Continuum and Relationships

In The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey sets forth a personal growth paradigm called the Maturity Continuum.  In the ideal world, according to Covey we would grow from dependent to independent to interdependent.  We start out totally dependent on our parents for food, clothing and shelter.  As we grow up, we become independent from our parents.  The final stage, if we choose to move forward, is to realize that when we work with others in a harmonious way, we can accomplish more than we could on our own.  Marriage is a perfect opportunity to demonstrate interdependence.  Where are you on the Maturity Continuum physically, mentally and emotionally?  How does your location on the Maturity Continuum affect your relationships?

Happy Relationship News

The United States divorce rate fell again in 2009, according to a report released Friday by the National Center for Health Statistics.
In the states for which data were available, there were 3.4 divorces per 1,000 people in 2009, following rates of 3.5 divorces per 1,000 people in 2008 and 3.6 divorces per 1,000 people in 2007.