THE SCARCITY TRAP
What Is It
The scarcity trap is when you believe that there is a limited supply of possible partners. You act on that belief by thinking you have to take what you can get or be alone. In other words, you SETTLE for less. And let’s face it–expect less and you get less.
What Was It Like For Diane
I live in Fairfield, Iowa-a small town of 10,000 in the heartland of America. When I did start to date many years after my divorce, I realized that I was not finding a match. I started to worry and think that maybe I should not be so fussy. The next man I dated was “cute and nice” but his vision for the future was so different from mine it was ridiculous. Don’t be so fussy I told myself. I decided to make the best of what this man did offer and spent 6-8 months of my time with him, knowing I would eventually not be fulfilled in this relationship. It wasn’t his fault–it was mine–I settled. Eventually I was “in the way” of the direction his life was moving and he broke up with me. Ouch, Ouch, Ouch!
How Diane Got Out Of The Scarcity Trap
I was mortified and mad at myself for settling. I took a long hard look at why I let this happen. I read books, worked with a coach and attended workshops. This allowed me to become real clear about my purpose, my vision and what I valued in my ideal relationship. I made up my mind and found a support system to ensure that I held to my commitment not to settle, even in this small Midwest town. It worked-I met the love of my life-Lewis.
To stay out of the Scarcity Trap say NO to what you don’t want so you are ready and available for the YES. There is a person for you and you are worthy!
Diane and Lewis